Stubborn Chins and Flaky Principles

It took me quite a few gos, and my instructor sevgeral grey hairs, before I eventually passed my CBT (basic motorbike training).  I persevered because I hate giving up, especially if someone thinks I can’t do it, and then if it’s because I’m a girl! 

I’ve never been one to take up ‘dares’, it just seemed idiotic to me to do something because someone moron dared you to do it; but I was always stupid enough to do it if someone thought I wouldn’t be able to.  My mum drilled into me from an early age that the only thing stopping me from achieving anything was my mind – anything is possible with enough determination. 

I’m a lazy soul at heart, evidenced by my broadening waist/thigh/ankleline, and would far rather veg out in my reading chair with a good book than walk the hills.  exercising the brain is still exercising (I’m good at avoidance tactics too).  So how I manage to stir myself because someone happens to mention that I’m incapable is one of my personal mysteries. 

Passing my CBT was enough.  I’d done it.  After that I rarely went on the bike again – so why take the test, you might ask yourself.  Hmm.  Same goes for learning to knit, sew, swim, dive, sail, martial arts, reflexology (I can’t bear to touch people’s feet yet I completed the course!), riding lessons (I gave up halfway through because my spine insisted)… the list goes on and on. 

I still have a whole other list of things I want to learn such as scuba diving, welding, sky-diving/parachuting, skiing, water-skiing… and I will learn them at some point, sometime.  But after I’ve learnt them they will be ticked off and forgotten.

So why do them?  Why even have them on the list?  I honestly don’t know.  It’s not as though I need to learn any of them.  No-one as yet has challenged me or said I could never do them.  Yet there they sit, awaiting my attention and time.

But having said all that there is one thing that I cannot do and that is lose weight.  I have been pondering that awhile now and I have finally come to the conclusion that I have an inbuilt resistance, nay a powerful negative reaction, to everything my mother thinks is important.  Everytime we meet she mentions my size and when she does so I become ever more convinced that my size is irrelevant and the diet I had vowed to continue with come hell or high-water, or chocolate cake, is promptly dropped.

Ironic that my mother who told me I could do anything I set my mind to should be the one to make me stop doing anything she deems important.  If she ever urges me to take up sky-diving it will come straight off my list.


About Bea Turvey apprentice author and witch

I am a wild-haired author who cannot stop writing. The writing process is not a task for me. It is an extension of myself. When I write, I lose myself as easily as if I slipped into the story for a swim. Writing became a serious part of my life in Decmber of 2009. Unless you're reading this in 2017 it wasn't that long ago, and the bug hit me hard and fast. My first novel, Banished, was published in March 2010 and is available at If you read it, or anything else I've written, I hope you'll post a review and let me know why you liked it - or even why not!
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